Before I move into the Christmas rundown (get a cup of tea, settle in...) I'll start with the adorable Hank gem of the week.
Henry, sitting on potty: "Mommy, can I have a baby in my home?"
I mean seriously, how can you resist that? That's exactly what he said. So cutely phrased! Makes me want to go home and get pregnant right this instant. This plan would also have the added benefit of me being able to leave work.
"Oh sweetheart, I don't know. It depends on if God gives us another baby. You could ask him for one if you like."
*furrowed brows* "But Mommy, how can God hear me?"
*conversation about God and prayer ensues*
"Oh. Ok. So...'God, could I have a baby?'"
*3 seconds elapse*
"Mommy...where's the baby?"
I love this interpretation. Sort of like, you know, we could go select a baby kit at the grocery store, get her home, add water, and voila! Instant baby :) If only it actually worked this way. If the kit came with a nanny to do nighttime feedings, I'd have 10 more kids.
So, Christmas. Where to start, where to start...It was ok. But as I anticipated, the holiday itself was pretty stressful. I actually enjoyed the weekend following Christmas better (feast of the Holy Family!).
Things kicked off Wednesday evening when I had dinner with my parents, my sister Shauna'h, and brother-in-law, Brad. The new puppy, Roscoe, came to visit as well. In a totally expected development, we all fell head over heels in love with Roscoe and he cavorted at my house and played with Henry for many hours over the course of many days.
His face was kissed for hours, and his very fur carressed by every member of the family endlessly. He was a *very* good boy. No furniture eating or pee pee on the floor. He did try to nip at the dining room area rug a few times, but hey, nobody's perfect.
So anyway, back to Wednesday. As I waited for everyone to arrive, I worked on a few dishes for the Christmas Eve bash. I could tell that my serenity was a charade and deep down I was tense when I panicked after finding pretzel rods in my cupboard. You see, I was making a dessert with a ground pretzel crust, and I had asked Mike to purchase pretzel *sticks*. I suppose in all fairness the rods do look a bit like sticks. As in, real tree sticks, that is. But anyway, I had to grind the rods up with my heels and the whole time Hank was clamoring for my attention. Due to my distracted state, I mistakenly added some ingredients to the wrong bowl and I panicked again. You see a theme developing here?
I was making an Asian salad, and I got that into the fridge. I moved back to my pretzel crust dish and realized that I needed 2 boxes of jello mix and I only had 1. Curses! More panic. This would require a trip to the convenience store, which I was certain would not be a fun time. I was able to stop and grab a box on my way to dinner, and the dessert was completed Christmas Eve morning.
Which was when the fun truly began. I was wound tighter than usual and tornadoing through the house like wildfire. Finally, we had everything ready and were dressed for Mass. My parents and Shauna'h/Brad were enroute to go to Mass with us, bearing meatballs in a crock pot. As we await their arrival, I receive a text message from Shauna'h:
"Running late. Meatball disaster."
This doesn't sound good. When they arrive, I receive a cell phone call from my mom who is IN THE DRIVEWAY:
"Meet me at the side door with a roll of paper towel." Oh Lord. I do as I'm instructed and a mysterious cleanup process gets underway in my parents' Honda Pilot. Shauna'h brings some stuff in, and finally the crock pot makes an appearance. I do some more cleanup, and my mom tornadoes in (see where I get it from?) and rushes into my downstairs bathroom. As I clean, she's talking to me, as she brushes her teeth. She just came from her house, so I'm not certain why (1) she didn't brush her teeth there, and (2) why she carries a toothbrush and toothpaste in her purse, but I ask no questions. I learned these important lessons fairly early on in my life. We rush out the door and hurry to Mass.
From that point on, there were no disasters, but everything was extremely chaotic. We made it through Mass, squeezed into 2 pews, but the church we went to was huge, and the collection and communion took a REALLY long time, so by time we got back to my house, I was all wound up to tornado again. I did my thing, getting a few last minute items into the oven to warm, and people started arriving. Everything went very well. That being said, by time the evening was over, the following transpired:
(1) I drank too much wine
(2) Mike was sick with a nasty cold/flu thing
(3) Hank was fall-down on his face exhausted. He actually asked if he could go take a nap. My poor pumpkin.
(4) End of the evening stress caused Mike, Brad, Shauna'h and I to have a shot of Jagermeister together in the kitchen. People, I drank JAGERMEISTER. That's the indication of a true stressed out Catholic Librarian.
By the time everyone had filtered out, it was after 10 pm, and I was desperate to get my poor Henry to bed. In my haste, I actually forgot to leave out cookies and milk for Santa (worst mother of the year award nominee) and to sprinkle reindeer food out onto the front walk. When Henry noticed the next morning, horrified, the lies just slipped off my tongue like butter:
"Oh don't worry Honey! Daddy and I put some out, and he must have eaten every bite!!"
But at any rate, when we went to bed, Mike was coughing and I had a headache. During the night, I woke up with a full blown hangover. That's pretty tough to do considering I was only drinking boxed Franzia White Merlot. Oh right, the Jagermeister. Sigh.
I had to actually get up for some ibuprofen and go lay on the couch for fear of waking Mike, I was so miserable. Suffice it to say that I'll be a little bit more careful with my Franzia next time.
Anyway, Henry came down in the morning, and I still felt pretty crummy. Poor Mike was really sick, and after Hank opened his presents, I sent Mike up to rest. Hank and I watched the papal Mass for a bit, and apparently the pope was also having a challenging Christmas Eve :) I was worried that we were going to have to leave Mike behind, but after his nap, he rallied. We proceeded to my parents' house, where we mashed into their living room to open gifts. My mom also keeps her house headed well above 70 degrees, so it was a tad steamy in there. It was nice visiting with everyone, but I was anxious to head back home and have some more breathing space.
After the actual holidays, things improved. We went out for a nice lunch on Saturday, and I had my parents and sisters over to watch football yesterday. I spent lots of time kissing Roscoe's snout and cuddling him lovingly. This week we're headed to central Florida to visit Mike's parents and have a Christmas with them. Lots of family togetherness...
I'll go easier on the wine this time.
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