Monday, September 26, 2016

A lot of mixed parenting emotions this weekend...

Hi all! I'm going into the most intense teaching block of the semester, but I'm happy to report that I'm doing a lot better today with stress management. And you all play a big part in that. ;-)

It was a sublime weekend, filled with apple picking, football watching, Mass attending, beer drinking, and general fall frivolity. And guess what else? For the first time, one of my children attended a...


*wide eyed look of terror*

Henry is in 6th grade this year, and as part of the middle school wing of his Catholic school, his class is eligible to start attending the monthly dances. Henry is an introvert like me, and I honestly didn't think he'd want to go. But apparently his friends were going and talking about it, and as we all know, that is a major impetus for school aged children. The dances are held in the school gym, extremely well-chaperoned and supervised, and are fundraisers for the middle school field trips at the end of the year, so it's not like we had a good reason to keep him home if he wanted to go. So we let him go.

Watching him jog off down the street to catch a ride with his friend whose mom was chaperoning, I teared up a bit. Henry hasn't been a "little kid" in my mind in quite some time. He's almost as tall as I am, and has needed to wear deodorant for a few years now. :0 But still. In that moment, heading towards what I knew would be a new (and potentially super awkward) social situation for him, made him seem so much smaller to me all of a sudden. I wished I could protect him from all that.

I am firm believer, though, in fostering independence in my children. It's good for him to experience and navigate certain social situations without me there, especially given his more reserved nature. It's a healthy and good thing.

I know they need parent chaperones, and I'm so grateful for the parents who do chaperone. I want to help out so that the kids can have this fun experience in such a safe environment, but...I don't want to chaperone. :0 Because I want Henry to have that independent time without me right there. I was a shy, introverted kid too. I know that it's good for him to experience some things without me, it's good for his confidence. It's different for all children depending on their personality, but given his, I think this is the way to go for him.

I mentioned this all to him on our way to Mass yesterday, that I wanted to help out, but I understood that he may not want me right there for an event like that. And do you want to know what he said?

"It's OK, Mom. You wouldn't like it anyway. It's SO LOUD there with the way the DJ plays the music. SO LOUD. You definitely wouldn't like all that noise." *small shudder*

This kid? Looks nothing like me. He's BLOND and BLUE EYED. :0 But there is no doubt about the fact that THIS IS MY CHILD! :0 Of my two children, Henry and I are definitely closer to being kindred spirits. Made me smile. :-)

How was your weekend, dear reader?


  1. Hey Tiffany! Yes, watching the child that will always be your "little one" leave for his event that can't possibly be a rite of passage? I've been there in the past couple years, when each of my girls went to their Senior year formal, the equivalent of the prom.

    And my oldest girl's first "adult date" from this summer? Whoa. Instead of protection, oddly enough, when I heard her tell my wife through our door about it (while I'm half asleep) my "dad" feelings were one of "Well, she's flying to and from the nest on her own, now. I've done my job. I hope." Haha, and she described how she definitely didn't plan on a second date (again, while my eyes are closed, to her mother). And, the next day, I thought she's using her head. She's got this. And God's got her.

  2. Phil, this made me cry! Indeed, yes. It's all good. We can't help but have the feelings, but it's all good.


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