The scary thing is, I know how elusive sleep often is with an infant in the house, so I wish I could get some sleep now. But alas. I remember this from my first pregnancy.
This is how my nights go lately:
They actually start around 2 pm. Sad, but true. Start to feel groggy and exhausted. Maybe it's just the cold, but this week I feel like someone managed to sedate me without my knowledge or permission.
By time I get home from work, I'm on auto-pilot. I try to work up some energy to play with Henry and slap something on the table for dinner resembling food. For the time being, gone are the days of meticulously planned meals from new cookbooks. This would involve me actually opening a cookbook, and that just seems to require too much energy right now.
After Henry goes to bed, I try to do my Lenten reading and knit, possibly watch TV with Mike. If I make it to 8:30, I consider that a victory. 9 pm downright calls for a party.
I read in bed for a half hour or so and fall asleep.
Somewhere between 2 and 4:30 am, I will insidiously wake up. Whereas I used to be able to simply fall back to sleep, that seems to be a distant memory. I usually try one sideways contortion to get into a more comfortable position before giving up the ghost and heading to the restroom. I check on Hank, and get into bed.
An hour later, I'M STILL AWAKE. It's all very vexing. Sometimes, defying all reason, I'll have to go to the bathroom again. Other times, I just desperately try to soothe myself to sleep and am simply unsuccessful. Often, an hour after that, I'M STILL AWAKE. Naturally, I'll start to doze right around 6 am, shortly before I have to be up for the day.
The next day, this cycle repeats itself most nefariously. And the frustrating thing is that, right now, at 2:07 pm, if I were at home in bed, I could fall asleep in 5 seconds and be unconscious for the foreseeable future. Why does this not happen at night? Frankly, I blame the hormones. They're an easy target.