Boys...

I have 2 sisters; we never had little boys in the house growing up. I even had mostly female cousins. So, when my sister had 2 boys, and I had 1 so far, this was uncharted territory for us. Simply put, I'm not used to little boys, and let's just say...their equipment. I'm not going to go into too much detail here, it's just that in the potty training process, things are obviously different. There are things there about boys that I hadn't known before, and I wish I didn't know now. Here's a sampling of the things I learned from having a boy baby and toddler:

1) When changing the diaper of a boy baby, you simply must have something on hand to toss on top of their little fire hose lest you get a stream of urine right in your face. I found those itty bitty baby washclothes to be perfect for this purpose.

2) When potty training a boy toddler, (which usually involves teaching them to pee sitting down first), there are all sorts of creative ways that you, once again, can get a stream of urine where you really don't want it. Let's just say that I'm not a very good aimer. Hank will even declare "Mommy, you not good at aimin.'" It's all very nefarious; apparently, there is a way that the stream can make its way *between the toilet seat and the toilet itself* leak out onto the bowl, and onto the cute little legs (and super hero underwear and pants) of one CatholicHenry. This happens nearly every time.

3) When letting a toddler boy attempt to aim by himself...well, you just shouldn't do this.

4) When ignoring point #3, and attempting to teach a toddler boy to pee by himself, standing up, you must impart to him the importance of only allowing pee-pee to go into the toilet bowl, otherwise Mommy will be unhappy. This is especially important in the mornings, when the stream is most likely to have a mind of its own.

5) When working with a toddler boy involving potty issues, you will realize that they are already quite taken with this part of their anatomy. An actual conversation between Henry and I a few days ago illustrates this point quite nicely: "Mommy, look it moves!" "Yes honey, that's ok. Just leave it alone." "Look Mommy! It moved again!" It all harkens back to older male infants, starting at approximately 6-9 months, who will wait until a diaper change (or until company arrives, and is in the middle of your living room) to grab themselves, wide-eyed with wonder.

I'm certain that I have more things to learn still ahead of me. I'm just trying to get through this test as best I can, and with dry clothes.